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Thursday, July 11, 2013

Once Upon A Past

A few decades and some years ago:
I spoke my first words.
I took my first steps.

My knowledge and experience were limited.
 I remained undaunted
by the ever expanding boundaries of the universe.
My shoes were the only thing I could feel stretching--
And all that meant, was that a fresh, new, comfy pair
would find my feet soon

Time was yet to clock me with fear.
“The end” was still a closed fairy tale
of smooched lips and soft hands
tucking in my dreams,
and could be read again another night--
just as happily as bed times before


“Love” and “need”
weren’t spoken words
transferred to print and handed out 
to every passerby;
They were nourishments.
I nursed when the hunger came,
And spit out when I was full.

A smile,
a thank you,
a hug
wasn't a reflex--
rules set on the dinner table alongside china plates.
I never had to ask someone to
“Please pass the kindness”
each of our share was already there


I didn't know the meaning of “guarded”
Why fences were around some houses,
Why some adults were paid to walk with guns and vests.
I didn't notice cops and robbers jumping out of the television
And into real life...
bullets and knives flying
 tearing off the chains on playground swings.

Pain was something I wasn't supposed to have.
And if I got a hold of it
Mom quickly and gently took it away
while explaining that I was too young;
Then put it somewhere too high for me to reach.

Dreams were edible,
candy flavored, cotton clouds.
If I drifted,
I landed covered in dessert.            
Life was too sweet to hurt!            
                                                           
There were no big deals,
only big people.
I looked up to them
 And wondered what all that blue was behind them;
 They said it was just the sky,
 But why did it sometimes make them cry?

 I would find out someday
when through my sunny hair,
snuck in some grey.
When funerals replaced birthdays...

When I became the one with the sky behind me,
 taking the hurt out of a child's hands.

8 comments:

  1. Miseffin! This is amazing and I understand every word of it more than you know. Brilliant, real, clear. It reaches out and grabs your mind and heart. xo

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  2. I don't think I'm going to forget that line, funerals replaced birthdays, for a long time. Brilliant.

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  3. This is one amazing piece of writing..and isn't that how life goes with funerals replacing birthdays?? If only it wasn't so. This really touched me...and brought tears to my eyes.

    Kathy
    http://gigglingtruckerswife.blogspot.com

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    Replies
    1. Yes, it's sad that's the way it has to be. Thank you, Kathy!

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  4. Sad, yet beautifully written. <3

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